标题: zt Love Transformed Me: Confessions of a Serially Monogamous Shape-Shifter

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发表于 2014-7-7 17:32  资料  个人空间  个人文库  短消息  加为好友 
zt Love Transformed Me: Confessions of a Serially Monogamous Shape-Shifter

When you don’t have a constant physical form, it can be tricky to have a strong sense of self. As a shape-shifter, I’m constantly looking to others for validation, wondering, Will he think I’m more attractive as a cephalopod? Does being an arachnid make my legs look too numerous?

The first guy I really loved was a water beast. You know the Loch Ness “monster”? Krink was like him, but obviously younger. He was three or four centuries old, at most. He was very handsome, with the face of an anglerfish and the body of a beluga whale. Maybe I’m exaggerating, but that’s how he looked to me—not that physical appearance matters when it comes to romance. You know what they say: love looks not with the eyes but with an array of sensors along the body called “neuromasts.”

Soon after meeting Krink, I shape-shifted into a water beast and I moved into his cozy underwater cavern, in Lake George. For a while, things were wonderful. Krink’s laughter lit up the room. He was bioluminescent, so this was annoying when we were trying to hide from a predator. But right before he laughed he always made the cutest gargle-choke, which appeased both my anger and my pragmatic fear for our survival. On a typical day, we would gather moss in the morning and spend the next twenty-three hours not moving at the bottom of the lake. It was a comfortable relationship, but I eventually left him. He wanted a life partner, and I just wasn’t ready to commit for the next six thousand years.

I had been single for a few months when I met Rog. I’d travelled to the Himalayas in the hopes of getting some alone time, but my plans changed when I fell in with the tribe of the man-bears.

After I shifted into one of them, I was struck by how welcoming they were. Almost immediately, they cornered me and batted at me with their sharp claws to draw blood, which was a typical way to show affection in the tribe. Rog was the most brutal of the man-bears. He killed ruthlessly and without reason, so he was the majority choice for leader. Because he and I never went head to head in a death battle, I became his man-wife and co-king of the man-bears. It was a clan that consisted only of males, so, although I am a female, for this period in my life I identified as a male. Gender identity is even more confusing if you’re a shape-shifter. I left Rog soon after he ate his mother-father. I couldn’t forgive him for not saving me any of the leg bones.

I moved back home and planned to be a homebody for a while. I couldn’t date someone if I wasn’t going out, right? But, of course, that’s how I met Cleve, a ghost from 1813 who lived in my pantry. He had died in the War of 1812. He was so excited to get to the fight that he tripped on his unfastened shoe buckle and ran himself through with his own musket. He helped with the war as a ghost for a while, by knocking around wind chimes to creep out the other side, which was surprisingly effective. When the war ended, he lost his purpose and mostly took to moping.

After we met, he started to open up. He’d do small things, like heat his ethereal mass if we were in the same room so I wouldn’t feel pure terror. It was sweet. I shifted into a ghost frequently so we could swish our misty genitals together, and sneak into the neighbors’ house to watch their HBO Go. It was fun until he suddenly crossed over during a particularly bloody battle on “Game of Thrones.”

So here I am. Thirty-five, single, and doing well. I’m lonely sometimes, but it’s by choice. I’m trying to avoid the advances of the cute wood gnome who recently grew into a tree down the block. I want to take this time to figure out who I am. Am I the Cyclops I woke up as, or am I the winged horse I went to sleep as? Maybe I’m neither, but maybe—just maybe—I’m both.

Illustration by Warwick Goble.


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发表于 2014-7-7 17:41  资料  个人空间  个人文库  短消息  加为好友 
爱改变了我: 一个一夫一妻制的变形者的自白

当你没有一个固定的形体,要获得一种自我感就很需要技巧。 作为一个变形者, 我就总是要寻求知道别人的感觉,总在想, 他会觉得我像一个头足类的章鱼一样有吸引力吗?成为一个蜘蛛会不会腿显得太多了?

我真正爱过的意义个家伙是一头水兽。 你大概听说过尼斯湖水怪吧。 可林克 就像那样,但显然更加年轻。他最多只有三四百岁。而他非常英俊,长着一副琵琶鱼的面孔,和一个白鲸鱼的身体。

见到可林克后不久,我变形成一只水兽,我搬进了他在乔治湖的舒适的水下洞穴。有一段时间,一切是美好的。 可林克的笑声能点亮房间。他自身是发生物光的,当我们试图从躲避捕食者时, 就成为了麻烦。但就在他笑之后,他总是会发出可爱的漱口一样被呛的声音,这既平息我的愤怒,和我对生存的务实的恐惧///////。在典型的一天,我们会收集苔藓在上午和花下23小时不动,在湖的底部。这是一个舒适的关系,但我最终离开了他。他想要一个生活伴侣,我只是还没有准备好承担未来6千年。

我已经单身了几个月,当我遇到ROG。我已经走遍了喜马拉雅山得到一些独处的时间的希望,但我的计划改变了,当我爱上了这个人 - 熊的部落。

之后,我移入其中之一,我感到震惊,他们怎么都欢迎。几乎就在同时,他们走投无路的我,击我,用它们锋利的爪子抽血,这是一个典型的方式展现亲情的部落。 ROG是最残酷的人 - 熊。他无情地杀害了,没有理由,所以他多数选择的领导者。因为我和他从来没有去头对头在生死战,我成了他的人,妻子和那个男人 - 熊的合景。这是一个家族唯一的男性的组成,所以,虽然我是一个女性,在此期间在我的生活中,我确定为男性。如果你是一个形状移性别身份更是扑朔迷离。我离开ROG不久后,他吃了他的母亲,父亲。我不能原谅他没有救了我任何的腿骨。



所以我在这里。三十五岁,单身,表现不俗。我寂寞的时候,但是它是由选择。我试图避免可爱的木侏儒谁最近成长为一棵大树下块的进步。我想利用这个时间去搞清楚我是谁。我是我醒来的,还是我的翅膀的马,我去睡觉的独眼巨人?也许我两者都不是,但也许 - 只是也许 - 我两个。